The Tide
by Mormeril
Summary: Heaven's not a place that you go when you die, it's that moment in life that you actually feel alive. So live for the moment. And take this advice, live by every word, love is just a hoax so forget anything that you have heard, and live for the moment now. Inspired by one of my favourite songs. Might add more, I'm not sure yet.
1. The Tide

**So, I was listening to one of my favourite songs by one of my favourite bands: The Tide by The Spill Canvas, and for some bizarre reason I though 'this is perfect for Les Mis', because recently my brain has been Les Mis-centric, and with my foot being badly sprained I'm not thinking straight, so yeah. I thought acting on this idea was a good idea. So this story is entirely inspired by that song, and others later on as well perhaps, as I may add more if this goes over well. Enjoy!**

***Edit*: Thanks to judybear236 for the editing! I promise to (try to) pay extra attention to what I'm writing when tired from now on.**

The Tide

_And there's three, count 'em three, children playing on the beach. They were eager to learn, to be taught and to teach._

The three children laughed as they played together. Life had been harder since Cosette had left, and money had become tight. But things weren't too bad, they could certainly be a lot worse. They all knew it. But such moments of joy were rare now, and they were determined to take advantage of this one.

_There's Veronica. She's biting her lip as she watches the waves turn white at the tip._

Eponine was the oldest, and at eleven, it was already clear that she was going to be very beautiful with thick chestnut hair and dark eyes. She loved her younger siblings deeply, and did all of their chores for them, making her been stronger than she appeared. Unlike her siblings, whom she protected as fiercely as she could, she knew just how bad the situation was, and that things were likely to get far worse sooner than anticipated.

True, the prospect of going to Paris, which they would be doing soon, was exciting, but it also meant that the family had almost no money left – the main reason that their parents now practically loathed each other – and if they didn't leave then, they were likely to die.

_And there's Vada, radiating with joy and luckily she still can't stand the sight of a boy._

Next was Azelma, who was nearly ten. Her hair was more of a dirty blonde, and her lively eyes were a mysterious gray. Because of Eponine's stubborn protection, Azelma knew nearly nothing of the family issues. She knew they were going to Paris, and that their parents fought, but Eponine would usher her and Gav into her room and keep them there until the sounds of fighting would end. Such fights would consist of shouts and the occasional thuds and sounds of glass shattering. But Eponine would never let them see the fights, she would simply try to distract them and keep them happily oblivious.

Azelma didn't know why Eponine would do that, but it worked, and she rarely thought about the fights for more than five minutes. She was happy with her life, and was certain that travelling to Paris would be an adventure.

_And lastly there's Dade. His hair dances in the wind and he's wondering what love is, and why it has to end._

Gavroche was the youngest at eight years old. But while he was the youngest, he knew more than Azelma did, as Azelma was happy to go along with Eponine's attempts at sheltering them. But Gavroche knew something was wrong, and had managed to find ways to find out about the fights from right under Eponine's nose. Their parents hated each other. And soon they would probably hate _them_.

_And he can't understand how everyone goes on breathing when true love ends.__  
__His mother whispers quietly...__  
__Heaven's not a place that you go when you die, it's that moment in life when you actually feel alive. So live for the moment. And take this advice, live by every word: Love is just a hoax so forget anything that you have heard. And live for the moment now_

Two years passed, and the Thenardier children grew. Their family was in Paris now, and nothing had changed for the better.

_And there's three, count 'em three children growing on the beach. They were eager to learn, to be taught and to teach_

Their parents had been fighting again, so Eponine had brought her younger siblings to the gardens. It was a popular place during the summer, but it was clearly a place frequented primarily by the bourgoisie, which she and her siblings clearly weren't. But Gavroche and Azelma were happy, and that was what was important to her.

_There's Veronica, she's licking her lips as she waits for her real, first passionate kiss._

At thirteen, Eponine had hit puberty, but she was a bit thinner than she should have been. But despite that, she held her head high and couldn't help but dream of falling in love. She had already met a boy – Marius – and thought he was the kindest, most handsome person she had ever met. She had only known him for a few days and already dreamt of marrying him and having children with him.

_And there's Vada. She can't admit her jealousy of her sister Veronica, and how she's so pretty._

Azelma was twelve now, and her biggest concern was a fear that she would never be like Eponine. In her eyes, Eponine was perfect with her long, wavy chestnut hair, and her beautiful dark eyes. Even though she was a tiny bit underweight, she was beautiful, and Azelma envied her.

_She _had ridiculous pin-straight dirty-blonde hair and round gray eyes. She was plain looking, Eponine was stunning. She wanted to be loved, but felt that with her appearance, no one would give her a second glance.

_Lastly there's Dade. Still sitting on the dock. Ponders his life, and he skips his rocks. And he wonders when his father will return. But he's not coming back..._

Gavroche was ten, and while he looked happy, the smiles were mostly forced. Eponine had begun to live in a dream world, Azelma was certain that everything would be normal again soon, but he knew that nothing would ever be the way it had been before. Eponine didn't know it, but she had failed at protecting him from that reality. Every now and then, he found himself wondering if the father they had once had would ever return. But that man was gone now, replaced by a cold, cruel criminal who didn't care about them at all.

_And he can't understand how everyone goes on breathing when true love ends. His mother whispers quietly...__  
__Heaven's not a place that you go when you die__  
__It's that moment in life when you actually feel alive__  
__So live for the moment__  
__And take this advice, live by every word__  
__Love is just a hoax so forget everything that you have heard _

Fourteen year old Eponine crumpled to the floor, reeling from the shock of the slap. Her father had never raised a hand at any of them before, only their mother. But never them. She heard Gavroche gasp, and Azelma begin to cry. She had failed them. She shut her eyes, willing herself to her dream world with Marius.

_Forget everything..._

She was fifteen, and Montparnasse's hands were wandering over her skin. She shuddered, supressing the tears that threatened to fall, wishing that it were Marius instead. He was her best friend, and the only person in the world other than Azelma and Gavroche that she still loved. They were the only three that mattered.

Then his lips brushed her neck, and a single tear rolled down her cheek. The life she had dreamed of was gone, and would never happen.

_And there's three, count 'em three children missing from the beach. They were eager to learn, to be taught and to teach_

Her life was ruined. Her father had destroyed everything with his words. There was nothing left for her.

_But the sad thing is that they never lived passed the age of fifteen due to neglect from their mother, who was bed ridden by her ex-lover, their father._

Eponine was fifteen, and running through Paris, wishing she could keep running, away from Paris, from France, to anywhere. Anywhere was better than the Hell that she was now living in.

Their mother had done _nothing_ to help them. She had simply let their father do as he wished to them, and Eponine had practically raise Azelma and Gavroche herself.

Now Gavroche was gone, living on the streets. All of his innocence was gone. He was an adult in a child's body.

She still saw him occasionally, to her delight, but Azelma had vanished. Neither one had heard from her in months, and Eponine feared that her sister was dead.

And she herself may as well be dead. She had nothing left to live for, only dreams that would never be a reality.

_She didn't even notice, or pay much attention as the tide came in and swept her three into the ocean. Now all her advice, it seems useless._

Their mother had told them to just do as their father said, and look at where that had gotten them. Azelma was probably dead, Gavroche's childhood was ruined, and her life was a giant mess._No, heaven's not a place that you go when you die, it's that moment in life when you touch her and you feel alive. So live for the moment._

As she ran down the streets of Paris, not caring what others thought of her, she wanted to scream, or cry, or both. Anything to get rid of the frustration and anger and sadness that she felt.

_And take this advice, live by every word  
Love's completely real, so forget anything that you've heard._

She found herself by the Seine. The river was wonderfully beautiful, yet dark and foreboding at the same time. It would just be so simple to just jump in and let everything end, yet something was holding her back.

Marius' smiling face flashed before her eyes. She loved him. She could still live for him. For the hope that maybe, someday, he would see her and understand. She stepped away. There was still something to live for.

_And live for the moment now _


	2. Sober

**So, I decided that I liked this idea, and chose to continue it. Most of the chapters will be centered around a certain song, although some will be actual content from the musical (obviously). So the song for this one is Sober by Kelly Clarkson.**

***Edit* Thanks to Judybear236 for the edits and suggestions.**

Sober

Eponine was sixteen when she finally began to contemplate leaving home. Gavroche had left, Azelma had vanished, and she was beaten nearly every day, and Montparnasse never left her alone. But she found that she kept going back every week or so. It was all she knew, and she had difficulty giving it up. The thought that she actually did rely on her father and his gang disgusted her.

But finally, a year after she started trying to get out, she left, decidedly for good. She was seventeen.

_~I don't know. This could break my heart or save me.~_

For the first week, she avoided everyone she knew, her father's gang, Marius, everyone. She didn't want to cave in and be weak.

_~Nothing's real until you let go completely.~_

It was a full month before she decided to try to find Marius. He was her best friend, and probably was worried that she was dead.

She finally returned to the neighbourhood she had spent most of her life in. Nothing had changed. The streets were still crowded with poor people. Saint Michel was the same as always. And, to her delight, had the same Marius.

"Marius!" she called. He turned towards her, looking confused, but his face lit up when he recognized her.

"Eponine!" he yelled before running over to her and catching her in a tight hug. "What happened to you?" Concern was obvious in his eyes as he released her. "I thought you were dead!"

"I left them," she replied with a smile. "For good this time."

Marius grinned, thrilled. "That's great, 'Ponine."

_~So here I go with all my thoughts I've been saving.~_

She slept in a familiar alley that night, remembering Marius' smile when he had seen her. Perhaps she did stand a chance with him after all. Maybe those bourgeois girls she sometimes saw him mooning over were as meaningless as she always told him, and none of them would ever truly capture his attention like she feared they would.

_~So here I go with all my fears weighing on me.~_

It had been two months, and by some miracle, she still hadn't had a run-in with her father and his gang. And, even better, she still had no thoughts of giving up and going back. She smiled to herself as she leaned against a wall, waiting for Marius. She was finally free.

_Three months and I'm still sober. Picked all my weeds but kept the flowers. And I know it's never really over..._

It had been three months now since she had left. She had never felt happier. She was seeing Marius every day, and he had introduced her to his friends, whom she now saw nearly every day at their meetings in the Cafe Musain, where they were planning a revolution. Other than their leader, Enjolras, they were all very friendly and easy-going, taking to her instantly. Enjolras, however, was stoney and serious, and they all joked that he was made of marble. Eponine had been confused by this at first, but now she agreed whole-heartedly that he was, as he only appeared to care about France.

But all good things must come to an end, as she learned when she ran into Montparnasse.

_~I don't know, I could crash and burn but maybe, at the end of this road I might catch a glimpse of me.~_

"Well, well, well, if it isn't my little 'Ponine," he said with a smirk as he approached her. "Long time, no see."

"And a good thing too, I'm done with that life, 'Parnasse, stay away from me." She was furious. There was no way that she was going back again after trying so hard to get away.

"It's not going to be that easy, Eponine," he said threateningly, stepping towards her and grabbing her wrist, pulling her towards him. She could smell the alcohol on his breath.

"Actually, it is. She told you to leave her alone, so I suggest you do so," came a voice from behind her. She turned her head to see Marius, Enjolras, Courfeyrac, and Combeferre standing behind her. Enjolras was the one who had spoken.

Montparnasse clearly didn't like the odds, so he released her wrist and began to back off. "Don't you dare think that this is over yet, Eponine," he growled as he began to walk away.

"Knowing you and my father, it would be foolish to think otherwise," she shot back.

"Come on, Eponine, forget him, he's an idiot," Marius said, walking oer and grabbing her hand. "We're heading over to the cafe, care to join us?"

She smiled, happy that he was holding her hand. "I was just heading there myself," she replied cheerfully, all thoughts of Montparnasse suddenly gone from her head. She didn't even care that Courfeyrac and Combeferre were smirking at her.

_~So I won't worry about my timing, I wanna get it right. No comparing, second guessing, no not this time.~_

Thoughts of Montparnasse and her father did come back that night, though. For the first time in the three months since she had left, she broke down and cried.

She missed her family, and the way things had been before, before they had hit rock bottom, before her father beat her and let Montparnasse do whatever he wanted to her for a few francs or sous, whatever he could afford at the time. Before Gavroche had run away and Azelma had vanished. But that life was gone forever now.

There was no going back now.

_~Three months and I'm still breathing. Been a long road since those hands I left my tears in, but I know its never really over, no...~_

For the first time in her life, Eponine had given up on her dreams. This was reality. Her life, the life she currently was living, that was real. Her daydreams about her family being they way they had been once, when they still had Cosette and she had been spoiled – that was never going to happen.

_Wake up..._

And Marius... Could Marius ever love her the way she loved him? She didn't know. She hoped so, but so far he appeared to be blind to all her subtle hints.

_~Three months and I'm still standing here. __Three months and I'm getting better yeah. Three months and I still am.~_

She bit her lip, trying to keep from crying. It had been three months since she had last cried, and she was determined not to let bad memories make her cry again.

_~Three months and it's still harder now. Three months I've been living here without you now. Three months yeah, three months~_

Despite herself, the first tear fell, then another and another. She hated herself for crying, especially since it was just because she had lost the life she had dreamed of. She had always known deep inside that that life was gone. But the interaction with Montparnasse earlier...

What he had said to her, the way he had grabbed her... If Marius and his friends hadn't shown up when they had...

How could she have spent so many years thinking that she had needed men like her father and Montparnasse to take care of her when they were the reason that she was now essentially a nervous wreck? They had ruined her life.

And now she was managing just fine without them.

_~Three months and I'm still breathing. Three months and I still remember it.~_

The tears continued to fall, however. She couldn't help but remember everything that they had done to her. They had beaten her until she was broken, and her father had sold her to horrible men just so that he could buy alcohol and get drunk.

She was amazed that she was still alive after everything he had done to her.

_~Three months and I wake up~_

She heard footsteps approaching her, and looked up, frightened. She forced herself to stop crying, and began to try to wipe the tears from her face.

The figure got closer, and she relaxed slightly. It was one of Marius' friends.

"Eponine?"

"Oui, m'sieur Enjolras?" she asked, standing.

"Are you alright?"

She grinned, amazed that he, of all people, was asking if she was alright. "Is the marble statue actually asking me if I'm fine?"

He sighed and rolled his eyes. "Yes, I am. But only because I heard crying and you're the only other person here, and that man I saw you with earlier looked rather dangerous."

She sighed and looked down. "Montparnasse and my father aren't very happy since I left home three months ago, and I was a somewhat valuable source of income."

Enjolras inhaled sharply. "Do you have a place to stay?"

Eponine glanced back to where she had been sitting and opened her mouth to reply, but Enjolras cut her off.

"Other than the street?"

"No," she replied after a moment.

"Come on, you can stay with me. You're not safe out here."

She looked up at him in surprise. No one, not even Marius, had ever been that kind to her. Marius knew she slept on the streets, but had never done anything about it. And now one of his friends, that she hardly knew, was offering her the chance to actually sleep inside out of the cold. She nodded slowly and followed him.

_~Three months and I'm still sober. Picked all my weeds but kept the flowers...~_


End file.
